Making the world safe for kids
Well, just in case the news last month wasn't depressing enough, now we've got this.
The image of a little girl connotes so many different things: innocence, vulnerability, fragility. From the very beginning, the mere sight of my own little baby girl kicked up butterflies in my stomach. My child even today, to all appearance, is a slight, delicate creature, but she's resilient beyond her years. She's been through surgeries, injections, and medical examinations that would put many adults through a tough time, but she's always faced these with a gritty resolve that's suprised us all.
Today I'd give anything if I could tell her, truthfully, that the world is a safe place. That she can go to school without a care, that nothing in the environment where she's expected to learn will ever, ever harm her. But I still cannot do that. She hasn't asked me about recent events yet, and maybe she won't. But she's reaching the age where it's pretty likely that current events will be a subject of discussion, if not in class, then in the schoolyard at recess. What kind of realistic assurances can a father give? What can we do to make sure things like this never happen again?
We could ban guns. Sure, we could do that -- as if guns were the problem, or as if psychopathic killers couldn't find alternate means of carrying out a plan to kill. We could pass stricter laws, and maybe down the road there will be a federal law mandating metal detectors in all schools. But school officials and law enforcement people have said, following this incident, that there was very little that could have been done to prevent it. It was an Amish school in an Amish community, a place where humility, hard work, and nonviolence are supposed to govern all the community's affairs. Even if certain safeguards had been available to these folks, it is unlikely they would have accepted them.
So neither our girls nor our boys are 100% safe. Even if we could make sure their schools were, there's an element of danger every time we cross the street with them. There's an element of danger just living in New York City, where the terrorist attacks on September 11, 2001 claimed the lives of some children too. And what can we say about Nixmary Brown, who is neither the first nor certainly the last victim of child abuse to die from injuries inflicted by the most important people in her life? The most damning case is that of the latter, who was supposedly under the protection of agencies that committed the ultimate act of negligence. If we can't even protect the small number of children that fall under the eye of protective agencies, who can we protect?
It is all too easy to point fingers and to blame others. But, as I might have said in Nixmary's case, one of my pet notions is that, particularly when it comes to kids, we are ALL responsible for what happens to them. Not just here, all over the world. I'll take that one step further. I am not the father of just one child. To an extent, I am the father of ALL children, as are all adults with intelligence and a conscience. It doesn't matter if the children in harm's way are yours are not; it doesn't even matter if you don't have children at all. All of us, collectively and individually, creates the reality that children have to live, and each of us is responsible for everything that happens to all children, everywhere. Not just in Pennsylvania. Not just in the U.S. Every freaking where.
A tall order, isn't it? Where to begin?
Begin with yourself. Breathe in and out. Imagine yourself as a person who a child can go to for protection. Imagine a world where children are safe. Talk to your children gently, discipline them carefully, and never use violent means. Spend time with a child walking in the woods and noticing the different kinds of wildflowers. If you don't have a child of your own, or can't visit your own, take a nephew, niece, or family friend. Be patient with everyone, especially children.
When something bothers you, promptly address it. When you are wrong, admit it. Think of other people first whenever you can. If you see an older person struggling to make it up a flight of stairs, offer to help. Do this even if you're in a hurry -- especially if you're in a hurry.
Find a way to honor your sexuality without harming the bodies and souls of others.
And, oh yeah -- do everything you can to make sure your kids grow up to do these things too.
Capsule summaries of prominent school shooting
Timeline of recent worldwide school shootings
The image of a little girl connotes so many different things: innocence, vulnerability, fragility. From the very beginning, the mere sight of my own little baby girl kicked up butterflies in my stomach. My child even today, to all appearance, is a slight, delicate creature, but she's resilient beyond her years. She's been through surgeries, injections, and medical examinations that would put many adults through a tough time, but she's always faced these with a gritty resolve that's suprised us all.
Today I'd give anything if I could tell her, truthfully, that the world is a safe place. That she can go to school without a care, that nothing in the environment where she's expected to learn will ever, ever harm her. But I still cannot do that. She hasn't asked me about recent events yet, and maybe she won't. But she's reaching the age where it's pretty likely that current events will be a subject of discussion, if not in class, then in the schoolyard at recess. What kind of realistic assurances can a father give? What can we do to make sure things like this never happen again?
We could ban guns. Sure, we could do that -- as if guns were the problem, or as if psychopathic killers couldn't find alternate means of carrying out a plan to kill. We could pass stricter laws, and maybe down the road there will be a federal law mandating metal detectors in all schools. But school officials and law enforcement people have said, following this incident, that there was very little that could have been done to prevent it. It was an Amish school in an Amish community, a place where humility, hard work, and nonviolence are supposed to govern all the community's affairs. Even if certain safeguards had been available to these folks, it is unlikely they would have accepted them.
So neither our girls nor our boys are 100% safe. Even if we could make sure their schools were, there's an element of danger every time we cross the street with them. There's an element of danger just living in New York City, where the terrorist attacks on September 11, 2001 claimed the lives of some children too. And what can we say about Nixmary Brown, who is neither the first nor certainly the last victim of child abuse to die from injuries inflicted by the most important people in her life? The most damning case is that of the latter, who was supposedly under the protection of agencies that committed the ultimate act of negligence. If we can't even protect the small number of children that fall under the eye of protective agencies, who can we protect?
It is all too easy to point fingers and to blame others. But, as I might have said in Nixmary's case, one of my pet notions is that, particularly when it comes to kids, we are ALL responsible for what happens to them. Not just here, all over the world. I'll take that one step further. I am not the father of just one child. To an extent, I am the father of ALL children, as are all adults with intelligence and a conscience. It doesn't matter if the children in harm's way are yours are not; it doesn't even matter if you don't have children at all. All of us, collectively and individually, creates the reality that children have to live, and each of us is responsible for everything that happens to all children, everywhere. Not just in Pennsylvania. Not just in the U.S. Every freaking where.
A tall order, isn't it? Where to begin?
Begin with yourself. Breathe in and out. Imagine yourself as a person who a child can go to for protection. Imagine a world where children are safe. Talk to your children gently, discipline them carefully, and never use violent means. Spend time with a child walking in the woods and noticing the different kinds of wildflowers. If you don't have a child of your own, or can't visit your own, take a nephew, niece, or family friend. Be patient with everyone, especially children.
When something bothers you, promptly address it. When you are wrong, admit it. Think of other people first whenever you can. If you see an older person struggling to make it up a flight of stairs, offer to help. Do this even if you're in a hurry -- especially if you're in a hurry.
Find a way to honor your sexuality without harming the bodies and souls of others.
And, oh yeah -- do everything you can to make sure your kids grow up to do these things too.
Capsule summaries of prominent school shooting
Timeline of recent worldwide school shootings
posted by BreadBreaker at 11:09 AM
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